School Days, Dio Brando, and something about Tsukihime

September 27, 2007 at 11:34 pm 1 comment

So I gather everyone has head the news. Enough chatter about the adulterous prick getting his just desserts. I’ll just write my own ending because I feel like it.

Kotonoha, for some reason, calls Sekai, informing her of this quaint little abortion clinic just outside of town. Or something. Sekai, uh, I suppose refuses it for reasons unknown, so Kotonoha flips.

Kotonoha confronts Makoto, unsheathing her family’s katana (still razor sharp, even after all these years!), and promptly cuts the faggot into ribbons. And beheads him. Yeah, now you know how the samurai died with honor. By asking someone to cut their head off with their katana.

Actually, I was lying about the last bit. What actually happens is DIO BRANDO (Jojo’s Bizzare Adventure WRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY, 4chan) appears out of nowhere, mistakes Makoto for Joesph Joestar and performs THE WORLD on Makoto. except Dio isn’t throwing knifes at him or dropping a steamroller on him, but instead throws SUPERTANKERS at the boy and drops a NICE BOAT at the end of it all. Of course Kotonoha smote the head off him after Dio was done with his stuff.

Mail, rooftop, etc. Kotonoha shows Sekai the last thing she’ll ever see of Makoto. I’m so tempted to say Richard (of Looking for Group Fame, singing Destroy the World, of course) suddenly came in and flash froze the two girls, but that isn’t the case here. Kotonoha kills Sekai. (OH MAI GAA NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU)








Body. (By this time you know where my fan loyalties lie.)

Possessed by some unspeakable WW2 Japanese soldier spirit she does something akin to what the Japanese did to pregnant women: slice open the poor girl’s bellly and rip out the baby. Of course Kotonoha doesn’t know that babies are zygotes at this stage of pregnancy, and mutters something to the extent of “no baby” and “you bleed red blood”.

And then she sails away with Makoto’s head in her arms. Oh, I suppose she squicks the head of the formerly insensitive, philandering clod but those are technical details.

OK, alternate ending:

Shiki, chasing Van Fem, wanders into the world of School Days. He meets up with Richard (the undead warlock from LFG, duh), Nanaya mode activates and the both of them Destroy that World. Van Fem drops a NICE BOAT on Makoto. Actually it was closer to a supertanker in mass, but eh, boat sounds funnier.

Kotonoha marries Sekai in what seems to be a bizarre lesbian ritual. The child that was born to the two eventually start the Nanaya clan. By the time Shiki is born, there are no traces of Makoto’s DNA present.

I’m horribly evil, so sue me.

Entry filed under: Anime, Tsukihime.

This post is dedicated to wildarmsheero Onoz not the doll T_T

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Hinano  |  September 28, 2007 at 1:09 am

    You forgot the part when Kotonohamaru finds Makoto’s dead body kool aid man bursts through the wall going OOH yeAAAHH!!


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