Delicious violent Bad Ends :3

September 8, 2007 at 11:30 am 2 comments


Inspired from this delicious video.

How many ways can a man die? Let me count thee ways… … …

Shall I run him over with a tram?
Or throw him off a dam?
Would C4 be enough
To reduce him to dust?

Would a 50cal suffice
jammed up his rectal pipe
Fired from a distance
from a sniper with a chance?

Shall I torture him with glue
or the wastings of a grue?
Will SHODAN(1) be enough
To turn his brains to mush?

Or the twirling of his guts(2)
(Oh that would really suck)
Like spaghetti on a fork
Would it work or not?

Or maybe he would blend(3)
Like an iPod, I would rend
his flesh from his bone
With quick strokes from a hone.

Would impalement be too kind?
Maybe Vlad(4) would not mind
if I took his favorite spear
And gutted him here.

Should we expose him to The Bomb?(5)
I know the fans would be aplomb
to see him go out like a light.
Too bad he wasn’t bright.

Maybe a dose of F.O.E(6)
Might fit him to a T
Who doesn’t want to see
That poor guy soaked in pee?

Maybe the knife in his belly
Was the best way, really.
But we’d have to hear his whining
as he lay dying.

Don’t look at me like that
He deserved it, that brat
for stringing those poor girls
and wasting those pearls.

(I don’t compose poetry that much, but hey, when inspiration strikes, you gotta put keyboard to text editor.)

Footnotes:

  1. SHODAN. System Shock. Ruddy good game.
  2. Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni. Sonozaki torture method.
  3. Will it Blend? Popular series on Youtube.
  4. Vlad the Impaler. A cruel Romanian warrior whose preferred method of execution was impaling the defeated with spears.
  5. The atomic bomb. Duh.
  6. Etrian Oddessy reference. The F.O.E. is a dangerous foe that wanders the dungeon hungering for fresh meat and lolis to rape 😛

Entry filed under: Anime, WTF.

The 16th terrible secret of the Internet. Break the Support Disc, redux

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. jpmeyer  |  September 9, 2007 at 2:17 am

    HOW CAN YOU CHALLENGE A PERFECT, IMMORTAL MACHINE?

    Reply
  • 2. drmchsr0  |  September 9, 2007 at 2:34 am

    WITH ANOTHER!

    Reply

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I’M IN THE ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRMY.

And the prophet spake, saying: "Frak this, for my faith is a shield proof against your blandishments!"

- Alem Mahat, The Book of Cain, Chapter IV, Verse XXI

Email: DrmChsr0atgmaildotcom (at=@, dot=.)

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