Sonova… … … LITTLE BUSTERS OP

OSHI-

Ya Rly that iz sum Little Busters OP. Guantareed to get you jailtime in Canada, arrested in the USA, shot in China, and will cause a scandal in other parts of the developed world.

Also illegal in Singapore and will give you the death sentence.

I wonder if Little Busters will have GRATITUOUS LOLI RAEP SEX. Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Bow to your new desu queen.

So I hear Gainax lieks Controversy… … …

Me: So i hear Gainax liek controversys… … …
Gainax: OH YES I DO
Me: Well, I happen to have this Gurren-Lagann plush-
*watches in shock as Gainax raeps teh robot plushie
O_O
*backs off real slow into the toilet
2ch: GTFO FAG
Gainax: You otaku are smelly and dirty. I shall rape this robot plushie in from of your face.
2ch: DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Okay, so that a 4chanization of how the whole frikkin’ debacle happened. And I wished it happened that way. At least we’d all get some laughs out of it. Instead of this full-blown drama reassuring me that I would be better than that.

After all, Gainax is famous for trying to anger the fans. Just look at Evangelion. Depression or not, Shinji was made to ridicule otaku, episodes 25, 26 and the Eva movies were made to throw the fans into a frenzy of negative emotions, and now, this. Man, I would love to meet Anno. He’s like, the most awesome man in animation circles.

If this is what animé turns people into, I am very worried for the true fans. Not only because they have the possibility to turn into that, but also because of the backlash. (And this stems from personal experience.)

Also, a followup to come soon.

Top Blog Episode 3: Introducing the CHART OF ANGER

Drm Note: Sorry it took so long. Real life and whatnot. I’ve been looking forward to this all week, honest.

DISCLAIMER: This article is meant to offend, annoy, incite feelings of anger, and just outright ruin someone’s day. All in the name of humour. If you take offense to whatever is in this article, please do not complain. I have already warned you. Further complaints will be dealt with in the same manner as these reviews.

*ANNOYING OP MUSIC*

TOP BLOG, with your host, DrmChsr0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

‘Ello! And welcome to episode 3! Due to certain ‘technical difficulties’, the show’s out a little later than usual. Apologies for the wait and whatnot.

Well, enough of the jibba jabba, and on with the show!

This week, we feature a stunning Russo-American who’s formerly a fansubber, is female (PIME TARADOX) and is currently hooked with famous blogger jpmeyer, give it up for HINANO!!!!!!!!!!!!

*OSHI- OMFGWTFBBQIT Is it A MAN Mudkips lulz tits or gtfo

Ahem. Excuse me for a moment. We’ll be back after a few words from our sponsors

*LOL COMMERCIALS AnimeNano rox!

FLAMETHROWER HARPOON STRIKE

*mass impalation and burning of anonymous commence.

Annnnnnnnnd… … … Welcome back. Who said gratuitous violence doesn’t bump up the ratings?

Anyway, since Miss Hinano seems to be mercifully unable to attend today’s show, let’s get on with the good stuff.

Article 1

Oh my word. What cheap and low-quality wines we have there.Y’know Hinano, even if you don’t touch alcohol, I expected better taste from you. Honestly, which supermarket did you buy those wines from? The local greengrocer’s? Even a monkey-run vineyard could produce better wine than that!

Article 2

Factory-processed cheddar. Real nice, if you’re into MSG and salt and other toxins and whatnot. I’d suggest, Brie, Swiss, Edam, or Roquefort Bleu.  Handmade Parmesan also work.

Article 3

I am rendered speechless. My wit machine has failed. Even all my retarded memes can’t come into effect. I can’t help but scream THIS IS THE MOST AWESOME PIECE OF WRITING I HAVE EVER READ. I CRIED LIKE A BABY AND SHAT A BRICK HOUSE. It is that wonderful.

Hinano, I take my hat off to thee.

*snaps out of reverie.

Ahem, before I end the show, I’d like to introduce the CHART OF ANGER. Basically, this means that after the most brutal of test drives, ‘m going to rank them one by one, from a scale of 100 to -100. Here goes nothing.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd we’re out of time and I’m outta steam. See ya next week, folks!

NEXT WEEK: It’s an Exploding Hung bus!

I is 1 year old, lololol

[Insert pic of deeleeshus auauau] 

It is delicious flat chest I must-

Wait, wha? 1 year already? This is unprecedented serious affair! Armpits~ O_O

Okay, okay, getting serious now. Here are some random stats :V

• Total views as of right now: 191800
• Best day ever: 1299
• Total Posts: 311 + 1
• Comments: 1348
• Gayness level : OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNDD
• Threats to be stabbed over the internets: 1
• 4chan invasions: 1
• Number of Goons I know: 3 (I think)
• Anonymous on this blawg: They are Legion, man the f*cking harpoons.
• So I hear you liek mudkips: Yes I do, OSNAP I SEE WHAT YOU DID THAR
• Will I be on Blocksuki, lulz: No.
• Will Jason Maio actually bother to visit here: No
• Will Top Blog Episode 3 come out before Sunday comes: Yes
• lulz level: See Gayness Level
• Will you wait warmly while girls are doing their best preparing: Screw the wait, let’s do them NOW.
• Armpits: True Touhou fans know no other form of arousal.
• Am I in- Wait, that’s already a given.
• Are you gonna stop with the faux stats and actually say something: Yes

 Memorable points during thie last year of dorama and fail:

• CHART OF ANGER
• Realizing I has a semi-dedicated following
• Being on teh ANO podcast
• Blahblhablah dorama
• 4CHAN INVADES LOLOLOL

Ahem, like the Killdozer, I have no intention of stopping. Unfortunately, I am not armored as well as the Killdozer, so that means I ain’t gonna ram into brick walls anytime soon :V

Also, Reinforce-tan is your new desu queen, moar on that later.

tl;dr: Real Life invaded.

And I’m trying to fight back. I might be writing more irregularly from now on. Well, until the family laptop returns from the shop, that is. Which is in about a week or so.

I know you all are expecting something, but it’ll hafta wait for a while. It will be done before Sunday, I promise.

Remind me to fire my salvo at Japan for being fgts, plz.

Also, MrVacBob: I have come to realize that my usage of Oshi is wrong and improper. It should have been OSHI-

OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-
OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-OSHI-

Stabbings over the Internets GO~

Also, orz is one year old. More on that later, when I’m sober.

Oshi teh Shrinemaiden site iz bak

Oshi teh shrinemaiden site died, but got bettar :V

Some webhosting companies suck T_T

A position on fansubbing.

I smell propaganda.

Well put, kixor. Unfortunately, your argument falls flat on one major crucial point.

yesy consistently drops series due to silly things like loli content. It’s happened with Demonbane, and yes, it will happen to StrikerS.

YES NANOHA HAS LOLI CONTENT.

I’m quite sick and tired of people dropping series due to something like loli, Canada notwithstanding. Fansubber dorama also pisses me off.

Here’s something for all fansubbers to take heed. If you can’t handle any given series due to anyone in your group having ‘moral’ issues with ANY of the series you’re thinking of subbing (animé porn movies notwithstanding, those turn eew quick.), don’t start that series. Drop that sucker like a hot potato and forget it ever existed. For one thing, we’ll have LESS groups doing ‘one-hit-blunders’ and then stop at that. And we’ll have approximately 0.00000000005% less fansubber dorama. Which is good not just for me, but also for everybody.

Top Blog Episode 2: Hit by a Mammoth Tank’s worth of retardedness!

Drm Noto (Mamiko, LULZ): Ya Rly. His posts make me stupid.

DISCLAIMER: This article is meant to offend, annoy, incite feelings of anger, and just outright ruin someone’s day. All in the name of humour. If you take offense to whatever is in this article, please do not complain. I have already warned you. Further complaints will be dealt with in the same manner as these reviews.

*ANNOYING OP MUSIC*

TOP BLOG, with your host, DrmChsr0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

‘Ello! And welcome to episode 2!

Today we feature someone who really needs no introductions, and a downright lout, someone wh-

Audience: JUST GET ON WITH IT!

Ladies and gentlemen, Jason Miao.

*violent CABBAGE response* *even more violent fruit-throwing response* *someone humps a Mudkips plushie*

Oh dear. We’ll be right back.

*commercial break, lulz*

Offscreen: SECURITY! And A flamethrower!

*FOOOM*

…Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd we’re back. Sorry ’bout the violent response. Didn’t really expect it to happen. Now onto th-

Wait, what? All our copywriters have been stricken with a massive loss of intelligence? This is unpossible! I shall go take a look at this guy’s writings myself!

*looks at typical Miao post.* *becomes stupid.* *several minutes pass.*

Durrrrr… … … … …

*poke* *poke* *poke* *meme’d!* */b/tarded!* *mudkips!*

Guh… Where was I? Oh yes.

I can’t believe such filth actually exists on the Internet! It’s quite obvious he can write a halfway decent article, but for the sake of some idiotic reason only people like him know, he turns almost every post into a simmering, slobbering RETARDFEST. He blabbers on about the most minor of things, and fails to put his point across! Unless the point was that he’s a failure of a writer, that is. Which is so obvious, even a dead slug could feel his stupidity. That’s how bad his writing really is.

Oh, and as a public service announcement (since you all saw what happened):

Reading ANY of his articles WILL make you stupid. I repeat. Reading ANY of his articles WILL make you stupid. Any attempt to visit his site WILL make you feel stupid. You have been forewarned.

Well, that’s all the time we have for today. And I need a scientific journal to restore my IQ levels. See ya next week, folks!

NEXT WEEK:

Oshi Hinano, lulz.

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is War.

This is my comment on impz, Lupus, and Crusader’s rant on KyoAni and animé being mainstream. Note that I shift into propaganda mode about halfway through. I kinda got carried away there. And I see too many similarities between otaku and Christians in real life. Heck, I’ve been through a fair amount of it myself. So all of it, at least from my experience, seems to work.

I’m gunning for acceptance of animé, not just as a means of entertainment, but as a way of life. With things as it is, though, it might be extremely hard.

As for animé and mainstream, not gonna happen for a long while. We can thank Superman for that. For any Japan-based animated work to make it big in America and elsewhere, it has to be EPIC QUALITY. And it has to shatter their perceptions of animé as a whole. (tl;dr: planetarian movie.)

And it’s not just the media, but it’s fans. If the world sees us as more than crazed antisocial bad fanfic-writing cartoon-loving haughty people who scream at the latest animé releases, I think we’d be off to a good start in making people accept animé as viable and fun entertainment. We fans have to project a positive image to people in order to make the masses accept our way of life. And from the looks of things, we have one heck of an uphill battle to climb.

If we look at formerly deviant fan communities (Star Trek, D&D, gaming, just to name a few), they have at least gained acceptance, not just as entertainment, but as a way of life, mostly because of their earnest efforts to show the masses why they love their hobby. Of course there’s a fair amount of taunting, ribbing and tasteless jokes, but at least the public has accepted, albeit grudgingly, that their hobbies are relatively fun and wholesome. We need to show to the public that animé is not just fun, but wholesome.

I don’t care if the whole fucking nation does not know what an otaku is. If we’re going to adopt an arrogant attitude, that the masses are unenlightened and unwashed and we are the enlightened ones and that we have to ‘convert’ them, they will simply resist our efforts to show them why we love our hobby. In fact, if I’m not wrong, the mainstream media has been trying to put us in a bad light. So what if the likes of Densha Otoko can help us in a good way? The mainstream media WILL FIND A WAY TO PUT US IN A BAD LIGHT, even if it has to retread old stories to do so. And the masses eat this up, why? They don’t understand the whole story, and only know one side: what the mass media tells them. Contempt leads to fear, to anger, to hate, etc.

It starts from us, the fans. Carry on the torch that has been lit by Densha Otoko. Prove to the world that otaku can be as human s the rest. And when that happens, the world will be a little bit better.

Why do I say this? because it’s the only way to save our way of life. Right now, we are being besieged by hurtful, if sometimes true, news reports. Our games are called ‘rape simulators’. Our hobby is said to incite feelings of lust in teenagers. And heck, we’ve been linked to murders and terrorist acts. All it takes is a madman like JT or Ann Coulter to blow this way out of proportion, and we’re history. Heck, it’s already a problem in Japan, where packs of ‘otaku hunters’ roam the streets to prey on unwitting fans to steal their money (I don’t know if they have solved the problem yet).

Get this straight, this isn’t pre-WWI anymore, where people’s minds were open to strange and new things. This is the 21st century, where control of the media is not just possible, but has already been done, where people worry too much about their next meal to care about other things, where people simply don’t have the time to find out about everything they hear on the news. So what if we have the Internet, not everyone uses a computer in the way we do.

It starts with us, the fans of Japanese animation. We must show the world we are not creepy antisocial people. We must show the world we are not just human, but also fully(if somewhat questionable)-functioning members of society.

Ladies and gentlemen, we are fighting a war. A war that has no borders, no armies, and none of those shiny guns as well. A war that has, until recently, been confined to Japan. A war that the enemy has the upper hand, because they have already sown the seeds of fear and ignorance into the masses’ minds. This is a war that cannot be won by brute force and isolationism. In order to win this war, we must fight, not with force, but with diplomacy. We must win back the hearts and minds of the mases one at a time, by being nice to them. We must show the world we are not what they see us as.

Fight the good fight, brothers and sisters, for when the war is over, we need not fear anyymore the iron grip of the enemy. We can walk free, without the need to hide our hobbies no longer. Japan has shown us the way to win the war, and we must emulate its positive values. Keep a smile on your face, and be as obliging as possible. Spend time with your family and friends. Work dilligently at your studies, and keep your fanaticism in check. Do all these, and we are well on our wayto winning ths war.

(I apologize for the sudden shift in writing style and topic, but it really riles me up when I see otaku acting like arrogant louts not just on the internet, but in real life. They make zero pretense in hiding the fact they are otaku, and act as if they deserve it. It sickens me when they act in such a manner. Yes, I know not all otaku act like this,, but my experiences have told me otherwise. I do live in a country where free speech is a pipedream, after all.)

By the way, Demian, you’re wrong. Somewhat.

PS: New Top Blog tomorrow. And yes, I’m doing Mr. Miao.