TH’ ENGINES! SHE CANNAE TAK’ IT ANYMOOR!

Hurrr

My sheer pride (and lazy Spine Primeval) screams out in pain to do this but… … …

I think I may need help.

One man may be able to do a lot of things, but as it is, I stink at periodic updates, gatecrashing drama parties and generally being a lazy git is going to invalidate me way before my use-by date.

…That’s it, I’m unleashing the beacon for help.

I’m looking for two categories of writers to help me out: A dedicated second bro or sis (I do not mean that in the familial term) for dedicated writing and guest writers.

DEDICATED WRITER

He (or she) must possess the following things/qualities:

• Must be able to write. No third-rate trolls. EVER.
• Must be able to commit to a very loose schedule.
• No, Tyrenol, as much as I’d love to have you on board, you have some issues with the fandom in general to be considered.
• Must actually have fun writing.
• While I’m not too keen on doing episodic blogging, I’m… … … open to the idea.
• Willing to do collab pieces from time to time.

The following are optional, but preferred.

• Female (I’m not sexist, seriously! You could be a friggen’ homosexual or a furry and I DON’T CARE.)
• Comes with hamsters. (Did I mention I looooooooove hamsters?)
• Able to draw is a massive plus.
• experience
• Actually has a sense of humour

GUEST WRITERS

Guest writers need to meet the following:

• Able to commit to a bi-monthly basis (hopefully)
• Is able to work under the worst leader ever (no seriously)
• Ability to choose a topic of your liking a plus.
• NO THIRD-RATE TROLLS. EVER.

I’m kinda ashamed to ask, but I am kinda looking to spice things up a bit.

Anyone who freakin’ cares had better comment here first. Then send your application to the following email:

drmchsr0 at gmail dot com

Oh yeah. I just remembered. Interested parties looking to fill either position have two choices for entries.

1. Anime nowadays lacks a certain “soul” or “spirit”. Do you agree? (Word limit: 1000)
2. Choose your own topic. Impress me. Has to be related to animation, Japanese culture, and/or your views on what makes anime interesting. (Word limit: 750)

HURR HURR HURR HURR.

AM I LATE TO MULTIBLOGGER PARTY? Y/N

The best Persona 4 comic ever

No seriously, these are JAWSOME.

Here are a few choice lines.

Youske: “Dude stop polishing those balls” Kou Ichijou “I can’t man, THESE BALLS ARE ON FIRE“

Yousuke: “I HAVE TO PEEEEEEEEEEEEE”

“You become friends with Yosuke. Yosuke will now DIE FOR YOU.”

NAOTOKAWAIIYONAOYO: “Did someone say GIRLS? Because I’m a boy. Just so you know.”

And my personal favorite:

Kanji Tatsumi: “Hi, I’m Kanji Tatsumi and I LOVE NAKED MEN.” Yousuke: D:

CHEGGITOUT. (Because Peachi is a jawsome dude/dudette)

Edit: WHAT HAVE I DONE A NEW BANNER IS HILARIOUSLY DISTURBING.

If you told me a kungfu serial with robots IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE and the story of an everywoman ojou with electric powers were terrible ideas, I’d have hit you so hard I’d have punched out all of your blood

No seriously.

First up is the most ridiculous Gundam show to ever grace the television screen: MOBILE FIGHTER G GUNDAM. Take one measure of Gundam, mix it up with super robots, throw in as much KUNG FOOLERY as you can, and throw that idea to IMAGAWA (who also directed SHIN MAZINGER Z! SHOUGEKI!!!!!!!!!!!!!), and you get… … … …

The Best Gundam Show Ever. (Even surpassing The 08th MS Team! But SUPER ROBOTS OVERRIDE REAL ROBOTS. ALWAYS.) It’s retarded, it’s insane, and furthermore, Hong Kong and Taiwan are probably going to froth at the idea, but WHO CARES. This idea is SOLID GOLD. It’s AMAZING. It’s a lot fresher than most ideas for anime I’ve seen (kungfu robot tournament fightan is still a lot better than a lot of shows, Code Geass notwithstanding since I’ve never watched it).

And I’m not even at the tournament PROPER. Sure, the first few episodes are slow going and they had to stuff in the backstory at the beginning, but after the terrible, terrible exposition, BAM! ROBOT FIGHTS! UNDEAD ROBOT FIGHTS! JAWSOME STUFF HAPPENS. MASTER ASIA IS EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL! THE SHUFFLE ALLIANCE DIE JAWSOMELY! THE GUYANA HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANDS!!!

Schwarz Bruder ;_;

And then we come to A CERTAIN SCIENTIFIC RAILGUN. Or in romanji, TO ARU KAGAKU NO CHOUDENJIBOU. (Try saying that like Tesshou Genda. It’s extremely satisfying.)

3 teenaged girls with what could be accurately termed SUPERPOWERS (and one mundane one) experience life in a city of schools, occasionally interrupted by SUPERPOWERED bank robberies and scientific intrigue. The main character gets roped into these events without so much as a thought because she’s basically Nanoha without the magical crap and we replace her beamspam of death with powerful and creative uses of electricity. No kidding.

Some people say it’s crap, but I, for one, enjoyed the first half of the series. Light, consistent storytelling with likeable characters (Kuroko is an unbashed lesbian. Mikoto is a hardworking ‘normal’ student. Ui~hara~n~ and Saten play off each other very well. Most of the side characters are not annoying.) and a solid plot. I can’t believe people call this crap just because it’s JC Staff. They are formally forgiven for not making Tsukihime. And Shana (And I liked Shana ). And Zero No Tsukaima (in retrospect, JC Staff cannot be blamed for crap source material. Save for not making Tsukihime.)

And then we come to THE CLONE WARS. Which should be extremely interesting to watch. Where’s mah clone Railguns.

Also I refuse to use the weeaboo name for this show.

And mini-reviews for the rest of the stuff I managed to watch:

• Bamboo Blade: The best moe kendo show I have watched. If there were any other moe kendo shows, it would pale in comparison.
• Sunred Season 2: Go read wah. He tells it better. Sunred is still funny. And keeps itself fresh.
• PLANETES: It’s GARBAGE COLLECTORS IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAACE. And it is jawsomely jawsome. Great character-centric storytelling, much better than Haruhi, which shone in technical animation brilliance, but paled in character-centric storytelling.

18 days to THE LEGEND OF KOIZUMI.THIS SHOW WILL BE THE BEST SHOW OF THE SEASON. I GUANTAREE IT.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

can’t stop

must tinker with Ubuntu

and reinstall windows

Did I ever mention MGLN: ViViD is G Gundam with LESBIAN magical girls?

Because it totally is. Kinda.

And then all the wonderful G Gundam references can be made.

For example, TRUST YOU FOREVER needs to be remixed for the eventual Magical ViViD animated series. I don’t care how it happens, but IT HAS TO.

And everyone who has watched G Gundam totally wants THIS to happen in ViViD. And THIS.

And of course, the Lesbian Love TenKyoKen.

I totally want Vivio to do THIS. And THIS. And THIS. (IT’S THE SHINING FINGER, SHINING FINGER SWOOOOOOOOOOORD AND THE ERUPTING GOD FINGER)

Now all Vivio needs is a horse (okay, she has a rabbit plushie, but..). And to be tutored by DOMON KASSHU and MASTER ASIA. Probably TOGETHER. While sparring with KABUTO KOUJI in his MAZINGER Z.

(The next Nanoha show after Force will be about magical girls rocking off your faces, ala Macross 7.)

BURNING HYPE: The Shin Mazinger Z Review OF MANLY PASSION

I’ll readily admit one thing: I have never seen the original triumvate of Go Nagai Super Robot madness known as Mazinger Z, MazinKaiser and UFO Grendizer. I don’t think I was even born when Devilman was around. And Ive only read the first 7 chapters of the Getter Robo manga. And I have watched GaoGaiGar.

So when I keep hearing all the good things being said about the new Mazinger Z remake, and being a recent convert into the extremely silly and nonsensical (but totally wonderful) world of SUPER ROBOTS, there was no way I was gonna miss this show.

*CUE TESSHOU GENDA

THIS IS THE BEST SHOW OF 2009!!!!!

*UNCUE TESSHOU GENDA

Barring Imagawa’s GaoGaiGar remake (should Bandai ever decide to do so), and considering I have never seen the show before, I’m going out on two limbs here and declare this the best remake of a show I have yet to see.

If you thought Gurren Lagann was good, you have to see this. [Tesshou Genda]YOU CAN’T JUST SEE GURREN LAGANN AND NOT SEE THE MOST FAMOUS SUPER ROBOT IN HISTORY![/Tesshou Genda] JAM PROJECT sang the OP. And whatever JAM PROJECT sings for, IT WILL BE GOOD. Kanjite Knight is the best OP song of 2009 ever. Blowing Mizonokochi Sun Tribe, only my railgun, and even the cardiac-arrest-inducing Hidamari Sketch OPs OUT. OF. THE. WATER.

You can’t also ignore Baron Ashura, the formerly inefficient badguy-turned-sympathethic character-turned ULTIMATELY SUCCESSFUL VILLAIN! Imagawa has outdone himself, fleshing out Ashura’s non-existing backstory and turning the insane half-male-half-female person into a rather likable character, whose story almost threatened to take over the entire show (if it weren’t for MAZINGER ZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETO!!!!!!!).

And there’s the insanely hilarious BROCKEN BALL. Where everyone but Lord Brocken wins.

And HOLY SHIT NISHIORI TSUBABA PLAN’S TO KILL DOCTOR HELL IS SO LOOPY AND INTRIGUING SHE MADE KOUJI SUMMON HADES HIMSELF TO KILLL EARTH.

And ZEUS ROCKET PUUUUUUUUUUNCH.

I think I’ll piss myself going into the details. It’s GaoGaiGar-level BEAUTIFUL. No wait, this IS better than GaoGaiGar.

And I’m probably fangasming over this. Here’s a better writeup than I’ll ever give it.

IMAGAWA, WE NEED MORE.

Extremist otaku group suddenly becomes unfunny, resorts to lying to bring back their mojo

SUBHEADING: Group stopped being funny 11 rounds ago, claims Internet Toughguys

In what seems to be an extremely predictable and utterly boring twist of events, the extremist otaku blogging group known as “THE OTAKU ELIMINATION GAME” has suddenly stopped becoming funny.

In their latest “scathing attack” (read: Richard Dawkins-level drivel and yelling) on the horribly bloated carcass better known as animé blogging, they unleashed a well-coordinated torrent of abuse, destructive criticism, and related blather on a bunch of poor unfortunate blogging idiots who should have known better, while continually mauling the already-non-existent ego of a poor blogger whose crime was to cry out for attention.

And it what seems to be a desperate grab for hilarity, they resorted to lying about how popular a certain Danny Choo book. They say this about his totally boring and utterly meaningless book:

Otacool really pisses us off, and we’re sure it pissed off those who featured in it too. Aside from the fact there were very few real otaku in the book, anyone featured in the book were not given a free copy. So hold on a minute, Danny Reaps the rewards for a book that he didn’t do anything for, simply stick photographs together, and even those featured didn’t even get a free copy? What kind of bullshit is this? Fuck, they should have gotten a percentage, let alone a free copy.

Wanna know why they didn’t get one? Well here’s an OEG secret for you, a few of us were going to attend the Otacool signing to meet Danny Choo, but the turnout was horrible. It was a tiny stall with stacks of unsold books despite the hype Danny surrounded it with. we didn’t even want to go there and pretend to be interested. Hey, our image matters to us, and Danny would only have tainted it. Poor show. Didn’t you wonder why Danny took such few pictures and quickly moved on to Otacool 2? What a joke.

Which is a complete and total lie, considering that the vapid excuse for profit sold out like hotcakes. Kinda like the cake, but we know that the cake is not a lie.

No single person was available for comment, seeing as everyone else was too busy expecting the Agarest Senki REALLY NAUGHTY EDITION to come out.

For the last time Singapore, your cosplay scene is utter crap.

From the underground politics of cosplay to the shitstorms to even trying to stake a copyright on the term, we all know that if you like cosplay and you live in Singapore, the only good thing to do is to NOT participate in it. Ever.

And then you have things like THIS.

For the last time Singapore, do us all a favour and just forcibly kill off your cosplay scene unless someone shows up as Mazinger Z or GaoGaiGar. Or any mecha. It’s the only safe way to prolong an already crappy scene. And unless you want to bone GaoGaiGar (Protip: NO YOU DO NOT WANT TO), there’s no good reason to touch butts.

(Yes, apparently it’s also an issue in JAPAN as well. So sue me.)

I can’t believe I’m out of ideas.

I thought I had a good schtick going, what with January being where I complain about how much last decade sucked monkey balls and whatnot (Protip: I am totally yanking on your chain) and then, just when I get fired up, I run out of ideas and events that were significant to the last decade.

I’m totally serious here. Aside from blogging trends (and that in itself is a boiling cauldron waiting to EXPLODE), I’m left with either topics that I don’t have a good grasp on (THE INDUSTRY, for starters), or things I probably don’t know about.

So yeah, I’m asking about the hot events of the last decade. I’m SHOCKED at not knowing what to write too :V

Find your Inner Fire [AdviceDog] Prevent Burnout

Yeah, apologies for using a 4chan meme, but it’s so painfully appropriate here.

And yes, SPIRIT OF THE DECADE will resume later at an Internet near you.

Now then, with all this talk about burnout, jaded fans being massive douches (if they’re a douche to begin with, they will be douches justifying thier need to be all douchey) and people claiming either the moral or experiential high ground to heap scorn on people, I think it’s time we stopped trying to give “tips” on how to prevent or solve burnout and look at the root cause of it.

If there’s one thing I have discovered in over 3 years of animéblogfagging, it’s this. Finding what drives you to write about cartoons for manchildren is central to why you enjoy said cartoons. Or pen and paper RPGs. Or History. Or getting to know other people. Or just about anything you can think of.

This drive, more commonly known as a motivation, or in this case, the inner fire, is a rather tricky thing. For most people, it’s not easily discovered save for a divine revelation or long hours of painful, agonizing search and reflection. For some people, they ride on a crest of emotion which never fades. For others, the emotions are gone and all that’s left is a barren wasteland.

For those of you who are still reading and are in that barren wasteland where nothing seems to begood and wonderful, well, fear not. There’s hope yet for you. See, this is where you’ll be finding out why do you do that thing you do. Heck, for those of you riding that giant wave of emotion, well, it’s useful too.

The first question you gotta ask yourself is Why did you watch animé in the first place? Is it a cherished memory from your childhood (like mine and a few others)? Because it was a hip, cool thing to do? Influenced by other passionate bloggers to watch your first show? Friends? A sense of intellectual superiority over all that you’ve watched up until now? Knowing why you stepped into this “subculture”  is a very good stepping stone to discovering your motivation.

Second question. Why then did you blog about animé. The need to tell people how cool this new animated thing from Japan is? Ego-complex? How much it changed your life? Academia? Peer pressure? Finding out why you blog is very, very related to the first question, and would probably lay the foundation for the hard soul-searching that is to come.

The third question is more for the jaded, cynical of us. Why are you feeling so jaded, so disappointed, so cynical? Seen too much and need a break? Animé in general not living up to your expectations? Too much moé in your diet? It becoming an obssession and not a hobby? Too many retarded fans and not enough “voices of reason”? This question here is to help you find out the root cause of your frustrations and/or jadedness. And by then, you’d probably have found out why and might want to take steps to alleviate it.

And the fourth question. In spite of all this, are you still interested in the “subculture” to jump back in and why? This is related to the first question, and your answer to the first question and the fourth should be the same. Congratulations, you’re beginning to finnd that inner fire that’ll make your blood run so hot even the combined efforts of JAM PROJECT, Nobuyuki Hiyama, Tomozaku Seki and Go Nagai together could possibly not do it enough JUSTICE.

Though I must warn you. Realizing your inner fire isn’t for everyone. For some of us, it’s more or less a religious experience. Well, it’s for me in any case. Some of us have motivations that run counter to what is good (letting people know how cool cartoons for manchildren are is probably the closest thing to “good” I’ll consider) and I’ve seen that in quite a few people. And many of us will probably never find it.

Still, it’s a good diagnostic tool for when you crash and burn. I hope it’s been helpful.

And for those of you who actually care: Don’t worry for me. I’m focusing on the Source of my Inner Fire, and not the fire itself. Now that’s something completely different and would probably turn the entire post religious. Not that I mind, though, but it’s for the benefit of others that I try to keep it as religion-free as humanly possible.

SPIRIT OF THE DECADE: I’m so fuckin’ jaded I can make a ROYAL WARSTRIDER OUT OF MYSELF

Bit of explanation about the title: White Wolf’s Exalted (Yes, a fantasy pen and paper RPG that’s not D&D) has this material called jade. Like it’s real Earth counterpart, it’s a precious stone that can be used to make jewelry and has been used as money. However, in White Wolf’s Exalted, jade is also something to make magical swords and magical giant robots out of. Basically, I’m saying I’m a giant hunk of magical stone, enough to make GAOGAIGAR. Fuck yes I just ruined the joke. And yes, this is what I do when I’m not being an animé geek or BEING HYPERRELIGIOUS (No Rights Reserved).

No thanks to omo and wah for pointing it out.

If omo and wah are to be believed, the decade marks a significant number of writers who are, to put it bluntly, sick and tired of animé, and seriously want everyone to stop watching it and do something else. Of course, this is just me bullshitting on something no one gives stats about, but let’s just assume omo and wah are right about this trend.

There’s a slew of cynical, sarcastic reviews about Code Geass and Gundam 00, most of them written by “respectable” members of the community, stating in a cynical, sarcastic, bitter and dick manner why these shows suck. (Of course, when you break them down to funny 4koma, memes and porn, suddenly, the suck disappears, but I’m weird like that) There’s also what wah calls “often uninformed and cynical viewpoints” that these people tend to rattle off. And of course, there’s everyone’s favorite punching bags, the (two) douches who run Anime News Network.

Though I’d like to redefine the meaning of jaded.

From dictionary.com:

1. dulled or satiated by overindulgence.
2. worn out or wearied, as by overwork or overuse.

From the above definition, a jaded fan is just someone who may have seen it all, and not much would impress him or her. The jaded fan may or may not try to dissuade people from the hobby, and in most cases, they usually don’t.

HOWEVER. You don’t have to be jaded to be a terrible person. Being burnt out does NOT give one the moral high ground or the so-called “experience” to give an informed opinion (then again, who can you trust?).

You don’t even have to be jaded to either sound like an annoying prick, overbearing, or a straight-up jerk who thinks everyone is either WOMEN AND CHILDREN (Yes, I think Gil did say that.) or retards for not following your line of thought.

And one more salvo before I sound off.

While this in itself is enough for one more post, I just gotta ask anyone who is reading this. If there are any even reading this.

What fuels your desire, your need to blog, the purpose of even watching these shows for manchildren? Is it a desire to know more about it’s country of origin, to see traces of the Big Guy up there, or is it something a lot more sinister or mundane? Before you even start to burn out, think deep and hard (hurr hurr hurr) about why do you blog about cartoons for manchildren.

SPIRIT OF THE DECADE: The real problem with moe

The problem with moe isn’t really the fact that it’s “degrading” Japanese animation. If you want that I’ll talk on length about Aki Sora, now THAT’S DEGRADING. Japanese animation has always catered to the tastes of the “ignored” minority and not to global audiences.

The real problem is that there’s too much of it on the market. Yes, even if we factor in the fact that Japanese animation has always catered to the tastes of the “ignored” minority in Japan and not to global audiences, there’s still way too much of it. Too much for even me, and I don’t exactly have high standards.

And as I’ve recently relearnt, too much of a good thing is bad for you.

Well, I can name at least 3 moe shows that jive with me, 2 that I’m still considering, and one show that I’ll say is the culmination of what happened after Haruhi showed the world that moe makes money. Said 3 shows being ARIA (YES, AKARI IS MOE, SHUT UP), Hidamari Sketch and Bamboo Blade. (Also Strike Witches hurrhurrhurr)

And no matter how many people think anime is supposed to be “deep” and “thought-provoking”, well… … …

In Japan, Eva was all about TEH REI, TEH ASUKA and the gorram Evas. In America, Eva is considered to be “deep” and “meaningful”.

There’s also the fact that very few shows can actually provoke soul-searching. No matter how much I keep saying planetarian changed my life, the fact remains that it’s still a “game” that panders to otaku and how much they want to cry. That, and the only reason why it could change my life is because (brace for it) it’s probably my destiny (to put it in a way that pleases people) to be moved by the game in that manner.

But I’m going way off topic.  Here’s the problem.

If I see way too many freaking Walkmans on the market, I’ll probably be sick of Walkmans and Walkman-related products, advertising, and so on, and may start to develop a hatred of Walkmans as a result of it being too popular. And me being sick of Walkmans.

It’s the same thing about moe. Even though some people are thinking it’s ruining anime. Those people are missing the point.